Yike! The Super XV have started again and it looks like they are performing pretty well. Might be another Crusader title at the end of the year.
There's a blank line so any novices can get the joke. Ah, there you go. Baz just got it!
So. Super Fifteen. Seems like only a few years ago she was 12. Soon she'll be getting a license, voting and denting the car. But forget worrying about the future, how do these teenagers work right now? I gotta admit, I have no idea. So let's see if I can't figure this out with a few well aimed questions!
Auckland fans just rolled their eyes.
Hmm .. it seems he does. But he's an Aucklander so what would he know? Let's see what clues we can glean from this little article. "All Blacks rugby coach Graham Henry..." Hey, cool! Henry is still coaching the All Blacks. I like him. "Revamped competition." Uh-oh. Sounds like they changed something other than the age of the competition. "The Hurricanes" and "the other four New Zealand franchises." What!? New Zealand still only has four franchises?! When are Couties-Manukau going to be admitted? "Henry took time out to address the media on a wide range of issues." I bet he didn't mention the Rexona advert. "Some of the games have been of high quality, others not so good." So he does watch the Hurricanes play! "One point of frustration from the opening rounds had been the issues both teams and referees were having at scrum time." Well, at least they're still playing rugby!
Wellington fans just whacked their foreheads.
Does it have bonus points?
Oh, crackles. It seems it does.
Bonus points are gay. Did you know that in Super Twelve rugby it was mathematically possible to win every game and not make the semis? Don't know how this competition works yet though so I can't tell you useless trivia about in it bonus points yet. I do immediately notice that the Western Force are higher on the table than three other teams that have wins. What's up with that? Do they get points for byes now? Yes? Four points for not playing? Lame! And that table is dividing things up into something called conferences with top of the conference and wildcards. Some more investigation is required!
Australian fans are chuckling about now.
Who plays who and how do we get points?
For more on this click here. Super Rugby Rules. Ah, here we go. This is more like it!
Points Tabulation: Points will be awarded in all Super Rugby matches on the following basis. Win - 4 points. Uh huh. Draw - 2 points. OK. Loss - 1 point for loss within 7 points or less of the team that wins. Lame! Loss - 0 points for loss of more than 7 points. Ha ha! 1 point for scoring 4 tries or more in a match. Lame! Teams that have a bye will be awarded 4 points. Gay!
Determining semi-finalists/venues: Position in the competition table shall be determined by competition points as set out above. Yeah, but you get points for losing! In the event of a tie on points, position will be determined by points scored for and against. The team with the highest margin being the leading team. If a tie still exists, position will be determined by result of match between the teams vying for position. Wait! So if you beat a team and they manage to lose better than you, they go through on bonus points!? Why not have this criteria first? If still a tie, the most tries scored will define the leading team. Canterbury.
The top six teams will play off to determine the finalists. The winner of each geographical conference will qualify for the finals/playoffs. Whoa. Geographical Conference. The next best three teams on the overall Super Rugby table will be awarded wildcard entrances to the finals. Sounds like tennis. In week 1 of the finals the two conference winners with the highest points will be rewarded with a week off. So they can go to Valencia? The conference winner with the lowest points or the third placed team will enter a sudden death play off with the sixth placed team. Uh .. OK. There are still two more teams, right? Do they also play a sudden death match? Quarter-finals. Team Three v Team Six - (QF1). Wait. They just said this. So this means QF1 is the sudden-death match. Or, if Jerry was still playing, the sudden death-match. Also in week 1 the team placed fourth at the end of the regular season will play the fifth placed team. And you're calling this Team Four v Team Five - (QF2). Gotcha! ;)
The winners of the first week of play offs then go through to face the first and second placed team who had just had the week off in Valencia. Sounds like semifinals. But you do realise that quarter finals are so named because the contenders are divided into four, right? You cannot divide six into four without a little bloodshed!
OK. I think I've got a handle on who plays who when regular season is over. Now to find out what happens in regular season. It probably isn't very regular. And I'm going to have to find another source because Suprxv.com has some very contradictory rules below the ones I've copied here.
Hey! A video!
OK. Now I'm right confused. Why are there multiple matches against a limited number of opponents instead of matches against all? And how did the Hurricanes finish top of the table? I'm gonna let this one lie for a few weeks. My brain hurts. But at least I'm not a Saffa...
...South African fans are still none the wiser.
It was a joke. The Super XV was not the competition name, it was a reference to how well the Crusaders went against the Aussies.